It's a little known fact ...
From the mind of Clavin
Why Buffalos are like Beer (I already told you this one Peterson)
posted on 06/27/2006 5:51 PM
...it’s like this… A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members. In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine. That’s why you always feel smarter after a few beers.
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posted on 06/27/2006 4:53 PM
Cliff Clavin is Cheers' trivia-spouting, quirky, irksome mama's boy mailman. An only child, Cliff's father left him and his mother Esther when he was a boy. As an adult, Cliff has a brief reunion with his father (who is running from the law), but for the most part, Cliff's only parent is his mother. The two are extremely dependent on each other-scarily so-and Cliff lives with his mother well into his thirties. "Ma Clavin" treats Cliff like a child no matter his age.
Cliff can only escape his mother's grip whiling away the hours at Cheers. He has claimed as his own the barstool next to Cheers' resident barfly, rotund everyman Norm Peterson. From his perch, Cliff sprays forth a never-ending stream of trivia and posits thousands of cracked personal theories. He is notorious for this obnoxious behavior and is often insulted with venomous vigor by short-fused waitress Carla Tortelli.
Though he once dreamed of becoming a trapeze artist, Cliff is proud to be a US postal carrier. On the side, he tries his hand at stand-up comedy and even writing jokes for The Tonight Show. And though he could hardly make a living at trivia, he is ecstatic when he is chosen as a contestant on Jeopardy.
Cliff's love life is non-existent until he sends his mother to live in a retirement home and moves into his own condo. His first relationship is with neighbor and plain Jane turned bombshell, Sally. However, fellow postal worker, Margaret O'Keefe turns out to be the love of Cliff's life. The two meet when Cliff takes Margaret on as a postal carrier trainee. The two fall quickly for one another and all is well. Yet, after a motel liaison involving a postal vehicle, Margaret is fired and she joins the Canadian Postal Service. Margaret returns to Boston and asks Cliff to marry her. He accepts, but when Cliff starts to suffer from severe psychosomatic ailments, they decide to postpone marriage. Once again, Margaret goes to Canada, but returns to Boston and this time she is pregnant. Cliff proposes, finds out the baby is not his, but marries her anyway.
courtesy of tvland.com
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posted on 06/27/2006 3:38 PM
Hey...first of all...I love you Nahmmy, your a good man.
Sammy...boy the ladies better watch out for a couple of studs like us, angh!
Fraiz...hey buddy, not everyone can understand such geniouses like us, can they huh-huh?
Paulie, some day maybe I can show you some tricks so you can be a studmeister like like Sammy and me. Hey....the ladies love a man in uni-fahm!
Carla, I know your always mean to me because well anghhhhhh...your a little hot under the collar for me! huh-huh-huh.
Woodrow, keep serving them up and I'll educate you with my knowledge all day!
Coach Ernie Pantuso, I'm sure God treated you well in heaven good man.
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